support guidE
for
those who care for teens
Hello,
You knew it wouldn’t be easy to walk alongside teenagers, but you didn’t think it would be quite this hard. Caring for teens is full of contradictions—offering guidance without overpowering, witnessing their struggles without rushing to fix, holding space for their emotions while managing your own.
Others might just see an angsty, distant teenager, but you see the incredible young person they are and are becoming. You see their interior life—their deep longings, their capacity for wonder and for heartbreak. As you navigate the hard conversations, the missed connections, and the worries that keep you up at night, know this: you are not alone.
We’ve curated this support guide filled with resources, language, and encouragement to help you keep showing up—whether you need tools for deeper empathy, ways to build trust, or just a little hope to make it through tomorrow.
Bless you, dear one. Your love, your presence, your willingness to keep showing up—it matters more than you know.
With you,
Kate
A blessing for those who love teenagers
Bless you who love a teenager—
who carry them in your heart
and your worries,
who lie awake replaying the day,
wondering if you did too much
or not enough,
if they’ll be okay, if you will be too.
Bless you in the mess of it,
in the deep breaths before the hard conversations,
in the holding back
when you want to fix,
in the moments you feel like you’re failing.
May you remember:
these are the most fascinating human beings in the world.
May you have the grace to pause,
to listen before you advise,
to say, “If I were in your shoes,
I’d feel the same way,”
to trust that love, more than answers, is what they need most.
May laughter slip in at just the right moment,
fueling you for the days when joy feels far away.
May your steady love quiet their fears. And yours.
And bless you who never got this kind of care,
who are trying to offer
what you never received,
who are doing it differently,
even when it’s messy.
Imperfect as it all is—
your love is enough.
Be the first to know when we release a new resource like this one.
WATCH
Teenagers have a lot of feelings—but as Dr. Lisa Damour reminds us, emotional does not equal fragile (yes, she’s making t-shirts). In this conversation, Lisa shares practical wisdom for parents, mentors, and friends on how to show up without overprotecting, listen without fixing, and help kids trust their own strength. Because when we turn and face the problem together, everyone becomes more capable of handling it.
You can listen to their conversation, here.
READ
The Emotional Lives of Teenagers
by Dr. Lisa Damour
In this book, award-winning author and psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour takes parents on a journey into the interior lives of their adolescent children. Damour emphasizes the importance of feelings that fit the moment, even when those feelings are strong, painful, or negative. By helping teenagers embrace feelings that are appropriate to the moment, Damour argues that teens can become more skilled at identifying and managing their emotions. Damour also takes on topics ranging from social media usage to friendships, academic pressures, and more.
READ
Growing Up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World
by Dr. Devorah Heitner
Parenting in the digital age feels like walking a tightrope—how do we guide our kids through a world where every moment can be shared, tracked, and judged? In Growing Up in Public, Dr. Devorah Heitner offers a thoughtful, practical guide for helping kids navigate privacy, reputation, and digital responsibility. Instead of surveillance and panic, she encourages trust, mentorship, and open conversations—so kids can grow into their online (and offline) lives with confidence and integrity.
READ
Voice Lesson for Parents
by Dr. Wendy Mogel
Ever feel like talking to your kid is like trying to defuse a bomb—blindfolded? In Voice Lessons for Parents, Dr. Wendy Mogel offers a warm, witty, and deeply practical guide to communicating with kids of all ages. With insights drawn from psychology, parenting, and even linguistics, she helps parents find the right tone, words, and approach to connect—whether you’re talking to a tantrum-prone toddler or a monosyllabic teen. Because sometimes, it’s not what we say, but how we say it that makes all the difference.
READ
Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn’t Have to Heal From
by Rev. Meredith Miller
In Woven, pastor and parent Meredith Miller offers a refreshing approach to guiding your kids’ faith journey—without the pressure of having all the answers. Instead of rigid formulas or fear-based tactics, this book helps you cultivate honest, meaningful conversations about God, faith, and the messy, beautiful complexity of life. With warmth, wisdom, and practical insights, Woven equips you to nurture a faith that can grow and change—just like your teen..
READ
Tell Me More
by Kelly Corrrigan
Kelly Corrigan is the kind of writer who makes you feel like you’re sitting across from a friend—one who’s funny, wise, and unafraid to tell the truth. As a mom of two teenage daughters, she knows firsthand how hard it can be to find the right words in life’s messiest moments. In Tell Me More, she takes on the hardest things to say—the phrases that build connection, set boundaries, and help us navigate love and loss. With her signature mix of humor and heart, Corrigan explores the power of words to shape our relationships, proving that sometimes, saying “I don’t know” or “I was wrong” can change everything.
“The single most powerful force for adolescent mental health is strong relationships with caring adults. People are saved by their theater teacher. By the neighbor who notices. By the coach who cares.” — Dr. Lisa Damour
—From Kate’s conversation with Dr. Lisa Damour, on the episode How to Talk to Teens, Everything Happens Podcast
LISTEN
Pamela Morris-Perez: Suicide Prevention and Hope
Pamela talks with Kate about her daughter’s mental health and her family’s journey through suicide loss. They explore ways to navigate children’s intense emotions and ways to have courageous conversations with young people in crisis. A significant takeaway from this conversation is the reminder that talking about suicide actually decreases the likeliness of suicide.
LISTEN
Dr. Lisa Damour: Understanding Today’s Teenagers
In this conversation, Lisa and Kate reframe mental health—not endless happiness, but right-sized feelings we can manage. They offer scripts for tricky teen conversations, ways to be a steady presence, and language for parents who missed this kind of care themselves. Because sometimes, raising kids means re-parenting ourselves too.
LISTEN
Kristen Howerton:
World’s Okayest Mom
Idealization impacts modern parenthood, but according to Kate and Kristen, this is often detrimental. How do we develop honest expectations and language about what it means to raise children? Kristen argues that by embracing a non-perfect, non-glossy image of life, we’re better equipped to be honest with young people and ourselves.
LISTEN
Maggie Smith:
This Place Could be Beautiful, Right
Maggie Smith (poet and author of books like Keep Moving and You Could Make This Place Beautiful) chronicles the aftermath of a painful divorce she didn’t see coming. How do we raise our kids in the wake of such change? And how do we reconcile who we are and who we are becoming?
LISTEN
Coach K:
Love in Winning, Love in Losing
In this powerful conversation, Kate sits down with legendary basketball coach Mike Krzyzewski (Coach K) to talk about trust, leadership, and the important work of calling out greatness in others. From his storied career at Duke to coaching Team USA, Coach K shares what he has learned about the power of honest feedback, why trust is the foundation of meaningful relationships, and how four simple words–”I believe in you”–can change everything.
LISTEN
Coach Jon Scheyer and Vivek Murthy:
Made To Belong
Kate sits down with Duke Basketball Coach Jon Scheyer and U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy to talk about what’s quietly hurting us most—loneliness. They explore why it feels so embarrassing to admit, the pitfalls (and possibilities) of social media, and small, hopeful steps toward real connection.
FREE DOWNLOAD: A Lesson for YOuth
Does Everything Happen for a Reason?
Does Everything Happen for a Reason? Click on the image below to use this lesson with 8th-12th graders in a small group or Sunday school to begin a conversation about whether, as Christians, we believe everything happens for a reason. This challenges the cultural pressure to find meaning in all tragedy, which can be both freeing and difficult—especially for those who have faced loss, abuse, or struggles. Create a safe space for youth to explore this topic with trusted peers and adults.
CONSIDER THIS
- How do you navigate the tension between being a steady presence in a teen’s life while also allowing them the space to grow and make mistakes? What has helped you discern when to step in and when to step back?
- How does your own upbringing shape the way you support teenagers? What patterns are you working to continue or change?
- Dr. Lisa Damour always reminds us: Teenagers are the most interesting human beings in the world. And as much as they roll their eyes at us (deeply, profoundly, like it’s their job), they actually love it when we take them seriously. How can we show teenagers we take them seriously—not by being cool or having all the answers, but simply by listening with curiosity and respect?
And when you don’t know what to say, try these two magic phrases:
- Tell me the most interesting thing happening right now.
- Tell me more.
