A blessing for when your family disappoints you - Kate Bowler

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A blessing for when your family disappoints you

God, I am angry and hurt and so incredibly sad.
The very people who were supposed to love me and know me best
have let me down.
I don’t know if I’ll be able to let this go
or find a way forward.
I am losing my sense of home.

And the reality of it all fills me with a kind of fear.
However big, however small,
this pain always feels… unforgivable.

I know they are only human (really, I know),
but their mistakes feel like they echo through me.
They strike a painful chord that rings on and on.
I feel convinced, all at once,
that I am not loved, not known, not safe.

I feel small, all over again.

So bless me, God, when tears prick at my eyes,
and I feel lost to myself.
Bring me home.
Remind me of the places you’ve brought me,
the person I’ve become, when I feel your light and peace.
Forgive them for me when I can’t
and send some grace for this moment,
to keep my heart from breaking
or my temper from rising,
or any sentence from starting with “YOU ALWAYS…”

You remember me when I am a stranger to myself,
and an outsider at my own address.

This blessing is from our NEW book of blessings, “The Lives We Actually Have” (coming 2/14/23) and a huge thank you to Julia Samuel for offering us such wisdom and grace for how to navigate complicated family dynamics. Listen to my conversation with Julia here.

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jill keller
16 days ago

perfectly said for how I feel some times. Help me not to be a stranger to myself

Dee Decheubel
16 days ago

Well thank goodness I chose not to wear mascara today. Need this before the big Turkey day!

AcOlsen
16 days ago

I have spent decades saying:”It doesn’t really matter. I am fine.”
This is a year of acknowledging that it does matter and hurt, so I recited this blessing aloud [maybe more than one time]. What a painful yet lovely relief. I know Immanuel hears and will help; HE never leaves nor forsakes.

Maria
15 days ago

This is such a beautiful prayer. So very timely as I experienced these exact feelings yesterday evening. I have tears in my eyes as I write this. The only way forward for me is to live my life with dignity and grace.

Ellen
15 days ago

This is just what I needed… grace for this very moment..”Forgive them for me when I can’t and send
some grace for this moment, to keep my heart from breaking…”
Thank you.

Just me
12 days ago

this precious prayer hits home with me. Daily, perpetually living with the disabling wounds dealt by the ones closest to me, with whom i am supposed to be safe…is such a crushing grief with no escape in this life. Healing may come, but scars remain…. not to mention the anxiety of expected future woundings.

Heather Roberts
9 days ago

Thank you for this Blessing. Family upsets can pounce unexpectedly as it did this weekend. Your words summed up my feelings exactly. Thank you Heather

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