for the courage to do something difficult

God, I am struggling to face the difficult thing I know I should do.
The conversation I’ve been avoiding.
The help I should have asked for months ago.
The symptom I have long ignored.

Oh God, help me.
I am afraid to act
but afraid to admit my inaction
might be making things worse.

Blessed are we who recognize that
we are struggling under the weight
of the nothing that has happened
but needs to.

Blessed we who say honestly, God,
this is so hard, and I don’t know why.
The longer I leave it, the worse it gets.

God, help me begin—or even begin to begin—
though I can’t know how this will go.
Fill into that inner space
where I am quietly overwhelmed
and stuck in mud. Or maybe it’s quicksand.

I hear you say “I will strengthen you and help you” (Isaiah 41:10).
You go before me
and you are right here with me. Even now.
In my panicking, in my anxieties, in my master-avoidance.
Your love never fails.

Okay, my dears. Now’s the time. Do the thing you’ve been putting off. Right now. Take the first small step. Make the appointment. Schedule the meeting. Check your bank account. Tell a friend you are struggling.

Then ask for what you need next.

Bless you.